I promise this isn’t about to become some sort of dating blog. There are plenty of other things for me to hand wring and navel gaze about, but the response to my last post, in comments, emails and offline conversations, has been overwhelming.
You people sure do have some opinions. I probably have more, so I thought I would follow up.
Many folks seem to suggest moving, that all men in DC are self absorbed and narcissistic man children. I am largely inclined to agree; most are just that. But the operative word is most. I know, I absolutely have to believe, that not everyone here is like that. Hell, I am not the typical DC girl, whatever that means. Perhaps I could be flattering myself-it would not be the first time-but there has to be someone out there who is willing to take on a woman with too many opinions and an almost pathological love of Prosecco. This city is full of people. I have thought about moving, but for right now, it isn’t on the table.
Regarding the “women are vain and don’t give men a shot” camp: men are just as vain. Do you know how many husky/overweight/delightfully chubby men refuse to date anyone but “slim” or “toned and athletic” women? Staggering. Also, women outnumber men in DC. I think more than most cities, people know where they stand in the pecking order here.
I do agree that online dating has trained us to think there is always someone better around the corner. We want immediate spark and loin burning passion. Does that happen? Sure, I suppose. But most of the time I think that is fleeting. We all want to get slammed against the wall, but I need to be able to have some decent pillow talk after wards.
So, yes, for now. I feel good about it. No active looking. No forcing situations. Just enjoying the pretty fucking baller life I have made for myself.
{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }
What is that old saying?….you find love when you’re *not* looking?
Meh…right, wrong…who knows? You do what feels best for you. Ultimately I think that may be one of the most important factors in “finding” someone (ack, I hate that context).
You’re happy with YOU. You do what’s right for YOU. Because even if you find “The One”, you still have to live in YOUR skin.
(Also, I’m apparently into randomly capitalizing words. I probably wouldn’t date me either)
rock out. you’re awesome, why not enjoy it?
I didn’t respond to your last post because I’ve never online dated. Hell, I’ve hardly dated. I generally fall into the get-drunk-and-make-bad-choices camp. I think it’s awesome that you’re putting yourself out there and enjoying yourself the whole way. I have no doubt there’s a great guy for you, Lexa, and I wouldn’t doubt that he’s a nontypical D.C. guy living in the D.C. area.
(However, if you do decide to move for any reason, don’t choose Seattle. There are NO single, straight men here. None.)
I’m not the least bit worried about your finding someone. It’ll happen…maybe even in DC (which I don’t think is the dating cesspool it’s proclaimed to be; there are good eggs and rotten eggs anywhere and everywhere).
So you go and enjoy that Baller Life, but save some Prosecco for the rest of us, will you please? Men, schmen! The last thing we need is a bubbly drought.
There are good/bad eggs everywhere, DC just seems to have a large proportion of bad eggs. Could be the transient nature due to senate, congress and white house changes on a rotating basis, maybe? People tend not to invest in relationships when they are unsure of how long they may stay in a particular location. Just sayin’
I do like JP’s perspective!
It’s funny, I’ve been blogging since the late 1940s or so and the most negative comment I ever got was from a dude from DC.
I wrote a post with my theories on how to properly treat a woman.
His comment made it clear that he hates women and hates guys like me for… liking them, I suppose.
I barely resisted the urge to ask if by “guys like you” he meant guys who’ve never had to pay for sex.
Good for you.
I’ve begun to realize that the topic of “dating” is just as volatile a subject as wedding planning, pregnancy, and parenting—f*cking EVERYONE has an opinion, and EVERYONE feels entitled to share it. That’s all well and good. But, in giving an opinion, you gotta remember: different strokes for different folks. Right???
I haven’t commented on a blog in probably a year, but I feel some male commentary is necessary here. Lexa, I agree with you 100%. This is a very strange dating town. Most people in DC are self absorbed and narcissistic, its the nature of the beast. Coming from a “beach town” I fully understand the dating pecking order. It seems to be ignored in this area and after working at a bar here, I have seen it.
I date WELL out of my league on a regular basis and let me tell you, I respect it. I know that I can get away with it here. That is the thing really, others know they can too! The key piece to this puzzle is these guys getting away with shit, like I have been, don’t know how to treat a woman, therefore fucking it up for the rest of us.
Moral of my story is, Play on Playa. Go get yours and ball out like never before. Your friends (like me) will fully support your player activities. Most important of all, you have the vagina, therefore the power.
JP out