The summer between my sophomore and junior year of college I worked at a ranch in Colorado. That place was a gold mine of tales, and much like most things I have done, I am glad I did it if only for the story alone. If you have spent more than 3 minutes with me, the idea of me scrambling through the woods or working as a housekeeper is laughable. Aunt LifeSaver has referred to it as the summer I pushed my personality to its limits. I spend my whole time there convinced I was going to die, the unfortunate victim of a freak moose attack or bobcat mauling.
It was a 5 star ranch, a getaway for millionaires who wanted to spend obscene amount of money to muck stalls in an attempt to feel like working folk. I had never been around so many filthy rich people in my life; it was a world in which I was wholly unaccustomed. There where 5-year-olds were more traveled than me and trophy wives flaunted diamonds that cost more than the house in which I was raised.
Some of the guests were generous and friendly, but as a general rule, the staff was viewed as the help and treated as such. Fingers were snapped, outlandish demands were made, and a sense of entitlement permeated the air. Most torturous for me was when I would get trapped in a room with one of these people and was forced to engage in awkward conversation. It was the worst form of human interaction, where you know both sides are in agony and looking for the nearest exit. More than once I prayed for one of those bobcats to come pounce on me as I painfully slogged through one of those little chats.
To this day, I will never forget the following conversation:
Richy McMillionaire, middle aged woman hailing from Miami: “Oh, and where are you from?”
Me: Rhode Island.
Richy: Oh…do you know what a mango is?
Apparently, we do not know about such things as tropical fruit in Rhode Island. We are devoid of vitamin C, dying of scurvy, mixing our mimosas with apple juice and making tomato upside down cake. I considered asking her if she knew that clams were, but I thought the better of it. I needed my $550 monthly paycheck.
Luckily I do know what mango is and happen to quite enjoy it. This char with mango salsa is fresh, light and perfectly showcases the mango. Char is a cousin to salmon; any sort of hearty fish (or shrimp or chicken) could be subbed in. This mango salsa could not be easier to make and the results are fantastic. People often say to me “I can’t cook”. I dare any of you to tell me that you cannot make this. The steps are simple and the results impressive. This would be a perfect meal to serve to guests and look like you know what you are doing.
Thank God for mango.
Grilled Char with Mango Salsa
1 ripe mango, diced (Note: you can buy mango already pre-cut)
1/4 medium red onion, finely diced
1/2 small jalapeno pepper, finely diced
2 tablespoons cilantro, chopped
1 lime, juiced
2 teaspoons honey
Salt and pepper
1/2 lb fresh char (or salmon, tuna, shrimp)
Combine all ingredients except char to make salsa. Chill for about an hour to let flavors meld.
Salt and pepper char. Cook for about 4 minutes on both sides, over medium heat. Finish in broiler if needed.
Serve with salad.
If that conversation happened with me, this is how it might have gone:
“A mango? No, I’m sorry, we don’t have fruit up in Rhode Island. Do you know what a ‘gggrhrnnnnmblllerch’ is?”
“Um, no?”
“It’s the sound you are going to make when I stick my foot up your ass.”
That is such a better response than me standing there with my mouth agape.
Um, what’s a mango?
Never heard of it.
I’m convinced that mangoes are the fruit of the gods. My Cuban roommate in college introduced me to mangoes and I have loved them ever since. She also hooked me on squid in its own ink with chopped onions, a Cuban delight.
It would seem I was as sheltered as you growing up in the Florida panhandle where nothing gourmet came from the Piggly Wiggly!
Oh, wow. I have never had squid in it’s own ink. Sounds fantastic.
Mango, is that what the doctors are using instead of silicone?
But then I would have gotten fired.
Yes, but you would have gone down in a blaze of glory.
“Do you know what a mango is?” *snort* Classic.
I love mangos and this recipe sounds like something I’ll want to add to my repertoire. Thanks for sharing!
It was something special. I really could barely respond.
Well, I mean, Rhode Island is lucky to even be counted an actual “state”.
I, too, would assume most produce trucks drive right through it without even knowing, being so small and all, and therefore leaving the indigenous peoples of Rhode Island without many of the foods we normal states are accustomed to….
RI is very densely populated!! We matter, dammit. We gave you Family Guy and James Woods. Is this not enough?
A mango? Yes, ma’am, it’s that fancy dance them spanish folks do, right?
Ha! Seriously, why couldn’t y’all have been there. Then again, I would have been unemployed.
umm..have you ever heard of a “bitch slap”??
xoxo
Oh, how I wish I could have.
How much is 1/2 a char? I assume they come in many different sizes. How much shrimp should I substitute should I want to do that?
Holy typo Batman-1/2 POUND. Thanks for pointing that out.
For two people? Probably 1/2 lb to 3/4 lb shrimp.
Me, I’d have fallen to the floor in helpless laughter if some fool had asked me that.
The char and mango sounds deeeeelicious! I might be using the salmon, though, as it’s plentiful here and I’ve never seen char here on the Left Coast. But I’ll look.
The only trouble I foresee is sharing it. People get weird about fruit in their main courses or salads, for some reason, the cretins. I might be making this just for meself. I think I’ll seed/devein the pepper just to further not scare anyone… for the first time I make it! Mwah ha ha ha haa!
Oh, I deveined the pepper as well. No need to breathe fire, methinks. I was going out that night.
“Mangos? Of course! Did you know a steady diet of them will take off 10 years from your appearance? I can tell that you have been eating them regularly because you don’t look a day over 70.” *Years added to estimated age for effect*
Barbara, cuttlefish/squid/octopus in its own ink is actually a Spanish delicacy but you’ll find variations all over the world.
Hm, I bet it is on the menu at Jaleo…I shall check.
She was maybe 50, but her skin was stretched within an inch of its life.
I checked the menu at Jaleo online…doesn’t look like it. I’ve come across very few places in the US that serve it. There’s a small but superb place here in NY, called Tia Pol that serves txipirones en su tinta.
Boo, that is too bad. Yet another reason to visit NY. I still want a burger there as well…
I would have stared at them vacantly and said, “No. Is that like a sex toy or something?”
I was 20…hard to believe, but I don’t think that thought would have crossed my mind at the time. There was a time where I was (a smidge) innocent.
“tomato upside-down cake”
Ha! Also, eww.
Yeah, I don’t think I will be making that anytime soon.
I just had a Kashi frozen lunch that was chicken and “rice” (in quotations because it was actually barley or something like it) with black bean mango salsa and it was quite good. I’m gonna have to try your recipe to make it myself.
Those kashi frozen meals are actually really good. I don’t think I have ever had that one though.
Hmm, googling for txipirones en su tinta on a menu in DC really does turn up nothing, but I still can’t believe that that’s the case (not everything is on the Internet). A friend of mine who is a chef (I’ve mentioned him on here before) proudly learned how to cook a good ‘tinta’ at his restaurant in Indianapolis for God’s sakes! Despite their nascent foodie scene, if Indy has it, I would think that DC had it, as well …
Ya know what I like most about this? That you guys are doing all the googling for me. I am so spoiled.
Oh and there’s a restaurant in shirlington (I think it’s called Extra Virgin) that has a squid ink pasta and I’m pretty sure it’s with squid as well.
Thanks, Jo. I will have to check it out.
I need you to hold my hand the next time I try to cook salmon. The last time (and only time) it did not come out well.
Yes, I’m that bad of a cook.
I am here for you, K. Not that hard; I promise.
B, txipirones is the basque spelling for squid, you might have better luck searching under chipirones or pulpo.
You boys keep working on this.
More than once I prayed for one of those bobcats to come pounce on me as I painfully slogged through one of those little chats.
No, no, no, that’s needlessly self-loathing. You should have prayed for the bobcat to pounce on the annoying rich person.
But I am so good at self-loathing! It’s like a comfy pair of shoes; I always feel right at home.
I’ve had “chipirones” at Taberna del Alabardero downtown on 18th St. Incidentally, I was there last night for Paella week. WORD, paella.
Paella. I adore paella. Thanks for the tip.
Freckled-Try broiling salmon, it will cook that fat off and brown it really nicely.
Lem- I’ve actually stumbled upon this salsa recipe on my own year’s ago. Really one of the best things with grilled hearty fish.
Never hate on RI. Home of Narragannasett beer, the world’s best fried clams, and the PawSax.
Yeah, this is one that is just classic and had been around. I didn’t read a recipe, just kinda threw it together.
Clam CAKES are even better. Also, love the Paw Sox, but more of a Providence Bruins girl myself.
In defense of rich snobs, one of your readers wasn’t “introduced” to mangoes until college, so perhaps there was some precedent in that rich lady’s life of the proles not knowing about mangoes.
I once had a b-list actor from a ’70s-80s sitcom give me a lecture about the proper temperature of wine and the reasons for it. Did you know that “room temperature” for red wine does not refer to the standard room?
Actually, I do know that. Room temp was established when houses weren’t so damn warm. Even so, condescending to lecture you on this.
Thanks for clearing that up. I suspected that it was 1/2 lb, but I really didn’t want to make any assumptions. Never actually cooked char before, but I’m REALLY looking forward to trying this.
Thanks for the clarification!
Of course! I hope you like it. Let me know what you think.
Being from LA, I was once asked if I knew what a bobsled was.
I told her I didn’t even know what snow was and that I assumed it was paper falling from God’s paper shredder.
She believed me.
The thing about this is, I know you are not making this up.
I *LOVE* the mango. I have similar picks from a similar meal we made recently. (When I say ‘we’, I mean ‘Zach’). Blackened salmon, tropical salsa, salad. The perfect meal. Perhaps this week on Food Porn Friday? We shall see.
You just cannot go wrong. It is the perfect meal. MM…food porn. Love it.
ZAAAAA! I can’t believe I just wrote “pick” instead of “pic”. SHOOT ME IN THE FACE, PLEASE.
Ha, I was going to fix it for you but your response is too funny…sorry.
i’m from massachusetts and i know what i mango is and enjoyed it in many fruit salads over the summer. i also worked in rhode island this summer at a high end steak house where the same type of demands and conversation took place…its so sad how those people live their lives.
Mango lovin’ New Englanders unite!!
Thank God, for a minute there I was afraid this would end up being a recipe for tomato upside down cake.
I do not want to eat that…even a little bit.
The mango is the immigrant’s answer to the question of who should go pick up the takeout. Or perhaps the gay Argentine dance of love. Just sayin’ like.
Is there a difference between simple char and Arctic char because in menus I only seem to recollect seeing the latter. Either way neither sounded that appetizing - like burnt fish.
Neither?! It tastes really good. Come on baby, open your mind.
I had a friend from Arizona who claims that when she went east for college she was asked more than once, and seriously, if she lived in a tepee.
Oh, that is rich. Humans are idiots.