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There is No Quahog, RI

There is No Quahog, RI

by Lemmonex on September 22, 2009

Someone out there tell me what there is to love about The Family Guy.family guy

Really, I don’t get it. Every time I watch that damn show I just walk away wondering what I am missing.

The pauses, they drive me insane. It seems far too taken with its own cleverness and believe you me, I love a good dick joke more than the average Jane, but seriously, can it please all just stop? I feel like it is written by a group of horny 14 year old boys hellbent on shocking each other.

Let me be abundantly clear: I am not a snob. I know this is something snobs actually say to conceal their snobbery, but its a true story. I love “Jackass” and think Johnny Knoxville is a bit of a genius for tapping in to our base sensibilities in order to roll around in a pile of cash. I have happily danced around to trashy pop music–”Barbie Girl” anyone?–and the most awful of all the reality shows are my favorite.

But the Griffin family? With their talking dog and that stupid British baby and the knowing glances and the self referential jokes? I don’t care that is is set in RI and I am therefor commanded by Buddy Cianci to love it. It is just so terrible. I cannot do it.

No, no. You cannot make me love it, no matter how many animals talk, no matter how smart it repeatedly tells me it is. I just won’t. I am sorry if that makes me uncool. I never really did fit in with the cool kids to begin with…and most of them didn’t really have a sense of humor anyway.

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{ 46 comments… read them below or add one }

Angela September 22, 2009 at 5:53 am

Me neither. I can’t stand the show.

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Arielle September 22, 2009 at 6:01 am

DUDE. I also f’ing hate this show. I don’t understand why everyone around me loves it so much.

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LA Cochran September 22, 2009 at 6:02 am

I don’t get Jackass, which just seems sadistic/masochistic (and not in the fun way) but I have come to love Family Guy. It’s all for Brian and Stewie. Hate me if you must but I can not look away.

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Brando September 22, 2009 at 6:06 am

In defense of the show, I do have to say that from time to time some genuinely clever humor comes through. Though you do have to wade through a lot of real clunkers, most of which consists of:

Peter/Lois/Unexplained English Baby: Wow, this is about as bad as the time I [insert completely irrelevent situation involving celebrity doing something strange].

Scene cuts to clip of celebrity doing something strange, having nothing whatsoever to do with the plot.

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Matt September 22, 2009 at 6:24 am

Barbie Girl?

Say it’s not so. If it is so… please post video.

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Julie September 22, 2009 at 6:25 am

I gave it more than enough tries and then I finally threw in the towel and banned it from being watched in my apartment. It makes my skin crawl.

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GingerMandy September 22, 2009 at 6:37 am

i hate it less than i used to, but i still won’t just sit and watch an episode by myself, for fun. south park will always have my heart when it comes to pointless, crude humor. no doubt.

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The Maiden Metallurgist September 22, 2009 at 6:39 am

See, I love the Griffin family and I hate Jackass. I guess even low-brow humor is subjective.

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Peter September 22, 2009 at 6:39 am

YES.

I am so with you.

I don’t know you, but I’d give you a kidney.

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k8 September 22, 2009 at 6:44 am

I hardly ever watch television, so I don’t waste time on something that doesn’t make me laugh outloud or sob.

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miss. chief September 22, 2009 at 6:46 am

i liked it the first few seasons but now it’s just the same jokes over and over, and, like you said, just a bunch of random crap that they use for shock value

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Kevin September 22, 2009 at 7:04 am

What? You mean the Twinkee factory isn’t in Natick? That’s where I was planning to go to survive the end of the world in 2012 (since we made it through New Years 2000 OK). And, with that, I’ve just about exhausted my knowledge of Family Guy right there. I don’t get the humor either, but Stewie and Brian are pretty funny sometimes.

Totally don’t get Jackass, although I did once interview Bam Margera.

[Reply]

Derek Reply:

There actually WAS a hostess(therefore Twinkie) factory in Natick. My uncle used to work there. So don’t lose all hope for the end of the world. And the Carvle factory mentioned at the end of that episode? Yeah, that IS in Framingham, the next town over.

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Derek Reply:

er. Carvel, not carvle.

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Taylor September 22, 2009 at 7:06 am

I effing LOVE Family Guy. Not sure why, I used to hate it, but it’s really grown on me. Something about them.

Jackass on the other hand? I think is really stupid shit.

I guess it’s all a matter of opinion.

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shine September 22, 2009 at 7:10 am

I don’t usually get it either. It has some funny moments, but if I have to watch a cartoon, this probably won’t be it. I like the baby in small doses, but mostly the rest of them make me twitch.

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Gilahi September 22, 2009 at 7:17 am

Well, you know, this is why there are different shows on TV. Different folks like different things. Same with music and food. If we all liked the same things, life would get pretty boring.

Having said that, I could not agree more that the REAL issue here is people constantly bombarding you with things you hate that they love. I have the same issue with sports. “Hey! You have a Y-chromosome so you must have watched the game last night!” No, I didn’t. “Well let me tell you all about it play-by-play!”

Don’t. Just don’t.

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LiLu September 22, 2009 at 7:21 am

I’m with Miss Chief. The first few years were hilarious for their novelty, but it’s since worn off.

Then again, you don’t like Always Sunny, so you are basically dead to me when it comes to TV.

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Brando Reply:

Whoa–she doesnt’ like “Always Sunny”? That is an outrage!!!

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bh September 22, 2009 at 7:24 am

Family Guy has it’s moments, and it can drop a dick or poop joke of jaw droppingly inappropriate and funny quality; however, it works WAAAAAAAY to hard to set up it’s jokes and that can be annoyingly unwatchable at times. Plus, I don’t care if he was Batman, Adam West’s voice creeps me out.

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Liebchen September 22, 2009 at 7:28 am

I may have danced around to “Barbie Girl” a time or two…

I was only introduced to Family Guy in college, and I thought it was ridiculous. Now, I won’t really watch it on my own, but it has its moments. More so than Jackass, for me.

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Beach Bum September 22, 2009 at 7:36 am

I never got it either. I hate that show.

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Hannah September 22, 2009 at 8:02 am

Ugh, I so feel you on this. Animated shows just don’t appeal to me, period. Never could get into “The Simpsons” or “South Park” either.

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Maxie September 22, 2009 at 8:13 am

I just don’t get it. Maybe it’s because i hate babies. Talking babies are even worse than non-talking babies.

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brookem September 22, 2009 at 8:13 am

ive only seen one or two episodes and frankly, that’s all i care to see.

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Phil September 22, 2009 at 8:14 am

It’s a communal thing – people laugh at it and enjoy it because everybody thinks they “get it”.

I don’t dislike the show.

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Marissa September 22, 2009 at 8:29 am

As a diehard fan of the Griffin Family, as well as Quagmire, Cleveland and the rest of the Quahog crew, I gotta say, this show is pure hilarity. It’s so unapologetic, which is what I think makes it so great. That and all the obscure 80’s pop culture references. It’s pretty much the perfect cartoon. Here’s where I’d post a bunch of “best of” clips, but I don’t think anyone can convince another to like a comedy because comedy is subjective. To each his or her own, I say. But yeah, I love pre-pubescent, self-congratulatory humor. And rape jokes.

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justjp September 22, 2009 at 8:34 am

Lexa, this for me is the Beatles issue for you. I just don’t understand.

Yes, I realize the fault in comparing the Beatles with Family Guy. Its all I had to go on at the time.

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Titania September 22, 2009 at 8:37 am

Couldn’t agree more. I hate this show too.

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Clairebell September 22, 2009 at 9:34 am

I have a love hate with Family Guy. Sometimes, it’s too much. Sometimes, it’s funny. But overall, I agree that the “OMG!! So Cool!” attraction is beyond me. Though I do like Seth McFarlane as a talent.

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Jaime September 22, 2009 at 9:37 am

Whenever I tell anyone that I live in RI, it’s usually followed by the question “Is there really a Quahog in Rhode Island?”

To which I reply with “Do you even know what a quahog is?”

Them: “Ha ha, you know! Family Guy!”

Me: “Yeah…. No and no.”

I don’t hate Family Guy. A lot of the episodes are at least amusing while not laugh out loud funny. I just hate that I can never escape that question.

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kate.d. September 22, 2009 at 9:42 am

THANK YOU. there was a stewie/brian the dog bit on the emmys this weekend, and i turned to my sister about halfway through it and said “THIS is why i hate Family Guy.”

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Brian September 22, 2009 at 10:06 am

I look at FG a lot like I look at South Park: there are moments of genius, but you have to wade through pools of absolute crap to get to them. Mostly, I like the pop culture references, but the Simpsons (still) do those better anyway.

Jackass, I could never get. To me it’s just America’s Funniest Videos (which I also never liked), but meaner.

Eye of the beholder and all that, I guess.

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Lisa September 22, 2009 at 10:19 am

I LOATHE Family Guy. I hate that it’s one more show with an intelligent wife and a big fat stupid fuck for a husband. I hate him. I hate that fucking baby. Nick watches it and the fact that he enjoys it makes me want to pinch him very hard.

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DF September 22, 2009 at 1:12 pm

Don’t watch it. Don’t really care.

Apropos, a girl once told me I reminded her of the kid with the football head, Stewie. (Yeah, you figure that one out Lex ’cause I was lost). I only knew tangentially what she was talking about but I played it clueless. When she pressed on about Family Guy and how awesome it was. I responded and I kid you not, “Ahh, I think I know what you’re talking about. Its that cartoon that appeals to people who like to believe they’re smarter than they really are.” At which point I turned my back to her and started chatting up another girl.

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Eric September 22, 2009 at 1:16 pm

You should see the episode of South Park where they lambaste Family Guy. It’s classic.

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f.B September 22, 2009 at 1:38 pm

I really like it. But almost for the reasons you don’t. It’s because it thinks so highly of itself. I don’t have to take it seriously. It does all that work for me.

Just don’t think I’d ever be that comfortable watching a dude staple his balls, though.

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Lindsey September 22, 2009 at 1:58 pm

My boyfriend loves that show and tries to force it on me every chance he gets. I HATE it! I keep wondering if maybe I just don’t get it, but after reading this, I know I’m not alone, so that makes me feel better about stealing the remote from him and turning it off!

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tia September 22, 2009 at 5:22 pm

i personally cannot stand family guy. or king of the hill for that matter.

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Jill Pilgrim September 22, 2009 at 5:50 pm

Yeah, I fucking hate that show. Classless.

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alexa - cleveland's a plum September 22, 2009 at 7:30 pm

there’s a guy named cleveland on the show.

that is all i know about it.

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maurice September 22, 2009 at 9:02 pm

@eric- yeah, it was the two-part episode that also attacked journalism (and Comedy Central itself) for censoring images of Mohammed. Bart Simpson made a cameo appearance. How could you forget the manatees?

That said, I don’t hate the show – it has its moments – but i’ll never seek it out. It started out as a smarter-ass ripoff of the Simpsons, and still has never really imprived on that, though it does have its own style.

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Lala September 23, 2009 at 6:51 am

YES YES f***ing yes! I hate this show. My brother-in-law and many of my friends are absolutely obsessed with it and I want to die every time I even hear any of the characters voices. I specifically hate the gay laugh that my bro-in-law and husband do when watching the show. I want to bonk them on the head with a cast iron frying pan.

I do love Southpark though. So I’m not a total snob when it comes to classless tv.

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Patrick September 23, 2009 at 12:51 pm

I don’t think the humor is very high brow and it’s packed with inside jokes and random cultural references- it’s not a completely mainstream kind of humor, but I like it.

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Dreich September 23, 2009 at 1:17 pm

It’s a great show. Like everything in life, some people like it some people don’t. Apparently some people find the simpsons funny and for some strange reasons some people don’t like Monty Python.

As Jesus once told me everyone has the same taste buds but tweaked to different amounts and if you lick enough shit, you’ll enjoy the taste of manure.

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scottstev September 24, 2009 at 7:32 am

There is a Quahog Bay in Maine (http://tinyurl.com/ycjo95q). Never got a chance to visit the area, but I instantly thought of “Family Guy.” Ever since “South Park” destroyed its premise a couple of years ago, I could never find it funny.

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Margarita September 24, 2009 at 6:30 pm

Family Guy is my family’s favourite show. I own every single episode. All the seasons. We watch them repeatedly. It is literally the funniest show ever. I love it.

ps. snob.

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