“Can I tell you a secret?”, I whispered. We were discussing a mutual friend.
“Yeah, of course”, my friend Preppy replied.
“Nevermind…nevermind. I can’t say it”, I shot back.
“Oh, this means you really want to tell me.”
“Well, ok…I had a dream about him once. Like, one of those dreams. A dream where, when I woke up, I wanted to just jump in a pool of bleach and pretend it never happened. It was awful. Awful.”
Preppy was, at this point, doubled over in laughter, taking pleasure in my pain.
“This isn’t funny! I have never had those kind of thoughts cross my mine about him. Oh GOD. You cannot tell anyone.”
He found my distress amusing, and frankly, so did I. I knew it was one of those things one cannot control, but it didn’t lessen the shame.
“Oh, you know. Just think of it like a bad acid trip…or maybe you ate a bad jalapeno or something. Don’t worry,” he reasoned
“That’s it! I ate jalapenos recently. I am absolved. Dude…never talk about this again,” I pleaded.
“Talk about what?”, was his wise response.
(Note: This is a tasty cornbread, made more interesting by the addition of jalapenos and green onions. I edited the original version of this recipe slightly; I added an extra tablespoon of sugar and cut down on the jalapenos. And it is light! Perfection.)
Jalapeno and Corn Cornbread
Slightly adapted from Cooking Light
1 cup all-purpose flour
1 cup yellow cornmeal
3 tablespoons sugar
1 teaspoon baking soda
3/4 teaspoon salt
1 cup low-fat buttermilk
2 tablespoons vegetable oil
2 egg whites, lightly beaten
1 egg, lightly beaten
1 cup frozen whole kernel corn
1/2 cup sliced green onions
1 medium-sized minced jalapeño pepper
1 clove garlic, minced
Vegetable cooking spray
Combine first 5 ingredients in a large bowl; make a well in center of mixture. Combine buttermilk and next 3 ingredients; stir in corn, green onions, jalapeño pepper, and garlic. Add to dry ingredients, stirring just until moistened.
Spoon batter into a 9-inch square pan coated with cooking spray. Bake at 375° for 30 to 35 minutes or until done. Cool 5 minutes in pan on a wire rack.
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{ 19 comments… read them below or add one }
Thank you, I am flattered. No seriously, it is good to be back. But really, how was it? The cornbread, I mean?
There you are! I miss you guys when you go AWOL.
It was great…the cornbread that is.
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I’ve had dreams like that. My initial impulse when I wake up is to look immediately to my right and make sure I’m alone.
And then shower.
I do like things in cornbread, but those look like a lot of jalapeños.
Some of the green flecks are onion, babe. It really isn’t bad.
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I had a dream like that about one of my French professors in college. I felt so dirty every time I went to class.
Yeah, it was horrific. Such an incredibly bad scene. ICK.
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I am that dirty dream, HA!
Cornbread looks kick ass definitely one of my favorites. I do like tons of Jalapeños though. Strong work on this one. Cheers.
I will never tell who the dream was about…and thanks.
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MMMM….add some shredded cheddar cheese next time (and by “some” i mean at least a cup) and it could be even better!
Ha, yes, but it would negate my whole “healthy eating month” thing. Thanks for stopping by, Lala.
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I’ve dreamed of a cornbread like this for my chorizo and cornbread Thanksgiving stuffing. And like Doctor Evil, I now have the final piece in place to rule…that day. Just the day, of course, not the world.
As for the dream, just like in the real world, as long as you enjoyed it, no worries.
Well, you start with ruling a day and then I think you can move on to world domination.
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Sometimes those dreams are fun. And sometimes they are very, very bad.
You know all of your male friends are curious now…
Half of them don’t read. They think this blog is ridiculous. But maybe he is part of the half that reads…ya never know.
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Well you just had to tell someone…anyone…didn’t you?
I needed to rid myself of the shame.
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Ooh, I am such a sucker for corn bread.
It really holds a special place in my heart, as well.
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Wait, are you Catholic Lemmy?
Heh. No, I was raised kinda Catholic, but I am atheist.
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I want.
*sniffle*
Aw, well…you can make it!
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Well if you were raised even a little bit Catholic you possess twice the average guilt of a normal person. It is widely accepted that Catholics are imbued with guilt, many orders of magnitude greater than that of non-Catholics…..except for priests, naturally.
Man, the burdens in life I have to bear….
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All tasty cornbread should be made in a cast-iron skillet. This is a Newtonian-level law.
Wow, I break laws even when I am not trying.
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I had a dream about a VERY attractive coworker year’s ago. A filthy, dirty, wonderful dream. I didn’t have an ounce of shame about it, but it did make it damn near impossible to work with her. I eventually took a different job, for other reasons, although not running into her chipper smile every morning was a massive relief.
It is very uncomfortable…and thats all I will say to protect the identity of the innocent.
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Oh yah, as a southern boy, the cornbread looks awesome.
The picture didn’t really capture it, but it is darn tasty.
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Have you ever had a dream about someone, then woke up and felt bad for the person you were dreaming about?
Phil, it is like you read my mind. The depth of my self loathing…it is almost bottomless.
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any dream that makes you wake up and look at someone different is hard to handle. sometimes it makes you mad at them in real life. so then they look at you like “why are you mad at me?” and you look back with the look, “you know why.” i think i started a fight with someone one time over something they did in a dream….never the less, corn bread should be the national bread, it’s so versatile.
I don’t want dreams entrenched in shame. But I can handle some good old cornbread…no shame there.
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It’s funny, I like jalapenos but they just don’t taste right in cornbread.
Peter! I think you need to try again.
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I wouldn’t spend even a second more worrying – chances are the person in the dream was really someone else; it works that way lots of times. And Preppy was wrong about the jalapeno; I am highly confident it was attributable to the ginger – any ginger. That would cause one to have the most vile of nightmares and that is even before going to sleep!
I think most problems in life are best blamed on ginger. You have the right idea.
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