In celebration of my almost (probably early tomorrow) 10,000th page view, I have been inspired to share 7 things you don’t know about me. With a list of 101 things already on this blog, some of this is merely expansion, but I hope you can give a girl a break.

1. My first memory is a baby shower. I don’t know who it was for; I was about 3 years old. I received a tacky bee hive, constructed from twine and adorned with little felt bees, as a favor. This hive hung in my room for years.

2. I am deathly allergic to bees. I discovered this when I was 10 years old. I was pulling a sheet off the clothes line and was stung on my right pinky finger. Within 15 minutes, my hand had swollen to twice it’s size; in 30 minutes I was suffering from a severe asthma attack. A few months after my diagnosis I saw the movie “My Girl”, in which Macaulay Culkin’s character dies from a fatal bee sting. I completely lost it in the movie theater. I carry an EpiPen very inconsistently, which is extremely foolish.

3. I have an ungodly tolerance for really shitty reality TV. I love that tranny muppet New York and cannot believe she picked Tailor Made. While watching “America’s Most Smartest Model” I recognized contestant Slavko from the Jerry Hall train wreck, “Kept”. “Paradise Hotel” completed me.

4. Middle and High School was not a happy time for me. This is not a unique experience, but it certainly felt it at the time. I suffered from acne so bad kids called me Helen Keller, saying the could read brail off my forehead. I wore glasses and had a weight problem. I found it impossible to censor my thoughts or control my snarky remarks. In an uptight town where J. Crew was the norm, I gravitated towards Hot Topic. I truly think feeling like an outcast in high school has made me a more well rounded, interesting person.

5. I love my name. Seriously. I will never change it.

6. My first concert was the New Kids on the Block, which is the same as half the girls my age. I received the tickets for Christmas and became completely unraveled. I was a Jordan girl. I experienced true euphoria for the first time when I received those tickets.

7. I had my sexual awakening to the “Under the Bridge” video. Watching Anthony Kiedis run, fists pumping, hair flowing, and tattoos blazing, quickened my pulse and shortened my breath. This set off a life long obsession with dirty rocker boys. Anthony begat Lenny Kravitz, which begat Chris Cornell. Dave Grohl still makes me feel a little weak in the knees.

And there you go–more than you ever wanted to know. Happy Holidays, kids. Thanks to all of you who stop by here and shower me with love and affection. I heart you, too. You may see me a little bit next week, but wanted to send some love out to the interwebs.