Always Seeking Advice

I am obsessed with advice columns. There is just something so ridiculously compelling to me about the human compulsion to ask strangers for validation, justification, or reason when weighing an important decision. Most advice columnists have no solid qualifications; they are written by talented writers that provide advice the same kind of advice that could likely be provided by a close friend or confidant. People’s inability to admit their darkest versions of themselves to friends is exactly what drives people these advice columnists, though. It’s much easier to admit those dark thoughts to someone you don’t have to look in the face afterwards.

Surely, some of the draw I have to advice columns is a sick sense that someone is always more messed up that I am, creates bigger problems, or is just plain stupider (more stupid? Hmmm…maybe I know the answer to the last one). We have all felt this schadenfreude when lingering as a bystander to someone else’s mess. I do my very best not to judge others around me, especially friends, and feel I do a pretty good job. I find my judgmental release in these columns.

One of my favorite columns is Carolyn Hax’s in the post. She offers her advice with wit and saracasm, but also true compassion. One of my favorite parts of every week–and I fully recognize how pathetic this is–is her Friday chat on washingtonpost.com. It is just so satisfying to hear her tell people how it is, or see someone in need actually get pointed in the right direction. Two hours every week isn’t going to change the world, but I am sure it has nudged some people to change their own worlds.

And these weekly visits to witness Ms. Hax in action have lead to an addiction I may need to seek some advice on: the washingtonpost.com chats are like crack to me. It has gotten better since a job change a few months ago, but these chats can consume my days. I find myself reading chats with subject matter I could care less about. Michael Wilbon, I have no idea what he is talking about, and Dr. Gridlock, well, I cannot even drive…but I seek them out nonetheless.

Luckily, though, I discovered the lovely Kim O’Donel through this obsession. She hosts “What’s Cooking”, and dishes out some simple, straightforward advice about the kitchen. I found some version of the recipe  below in one of her chats years ago; now I kind of just throw the ingredients into pot without following much of a recipe. If I grab a bigger squash, I use an extra apple and add more cream. It is such a simple soup; rules don’t exist or need to be much followed. A few things on this soup: I find it best to double peel the squash, always use low sodium broth so you can control the salt levels, and make sure to temper the cream before adding it to the soup or it will separate and fleck the soup with white dots. (Tempering means add the cream in a bowl, dump in a ladle of the hot squash puree, mix and then dump the mixture back into the soup. This step should always be done before adding cream to soup, but if it is skipped, it does not effect the taste. It just doesn’t look as pretty.)

Apple Butternut Squash Soup

1 large butternut squash, peeled and cut into 1″ cubes

3 granny smith apples, peeled, cored, and quartered

1 quart low-sodium chicken stock/broth (or vegetable broth if vegetarian)

2 Tablespoons fresh tarragon

salt and pepper

1 cup cream or fat free half and half

Put cubed squash, apple pieces and tarragon in a pot and cover with broth. Cover pot with lid and bring to boil. Lower heat and simmer for about 25 minutes, until squash is soft. Using an immersion blender, puree squash mixture (or use a regular blender). Temper cream and add to soup. Salt and pepper to taste.